The far constellation of Tau-Ketite
Became very weird and queer;
We send them a message: “Are you, folks, all right?”
But they send us back in high gear!
Life seems to be tight,
But still they are able to interact -
Our brothers and cousins of intellect!
I’m gliding along beams of glittering light,
My shuttle’s propelled by this glare;
I’m flying directly to Tau-Ketite
To see what is happening there.
We spotted some blight -
We see that the local society
Went nuts - it’s a cause for anxiety!
I landed my shuttle successfully, but
My buttocks are still feeling low;
I greeted the Tau-Ketiters: “Vivat!”
Which means nothing more than “Hello!”
The language of theirs
Is poor and scarce,
Their bourgeois system is naughty,
Their humor is nasty and dirty!
The Tau-Ketiters, of course, are a race
Like Papuans, as far as I know;
I cried: “In our cosmos you are a disgrace!”
They winked back at me with some glow...
The weights are so light,
There’s no atmosphere, no air
But Tau-Ketiters don’t care!
I shouted: ”Bastards, you want me to act?”
My robot with lamps and antennas,
Translating my question, was so exact,
That I felt ashamed of my manners
They’d come into sight,
Then suddenly they’d disappear -
They must have consumed too much beer!
“Is any man here?” I yell like a beast,
I see no man - oh, dear!
One local woman I grasped by the wrist:
“Confess, what is happening here?”
She said: “We’ve progressed,
we need males no more!
With males we keep no relations,
Instead, we do inoculations!”
I rushed to my shuttle, I started back fast
I’m flying away from these creatures;
But - gosh! - on the Earth several ages have passed
According to what Einstein teaches.
I fear the mankind’s
got too much ahead,
I fear the new generations
Have turned to these inoculations!